


On the Outside (Always Looking In)

by revlark



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Basically wanted to see how a normal person would react to this, Gen, also Bev didn’t move because I make the rules, also a writing practice!, i grow too attached to ocs, mentions of That Clown, mostly movie based though my mind’s canon is a mixture of Everything, once again i flipped off Stephen king, takes place the next school year after chapter one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 07:44:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20793119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revlark/pseuds/revlark
Summary: Derry is a normal town. Tanya is a normal girl. The losers are not normal.OR: another person’s view on the weirdness that is The Losers.





	On the Outside (Always Looking In)

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically a writing practice, since my next project’s going to be longer. Hope you still enjoy!

If you asked Tanya Clarke, she’d say that she was perfectly normal, and would say something like ‘thank you very much’ before turning up her nose at you and walking away. In short, she was very happy with her normalcy and her life, and disliked anyone calling it into question. Thankfully, it was easy to stay low-profile in the town of Derry, Maine. Nothing ever happened in this small town, and so Tanya’s life was easy to maintain. Keep your head down, do your schoolwork, talk to your group of friends at lunch, and walk home. It was simple. Though of course Henry Bowers and his gang caused trouble, she was rarely the target of it. It was hard to bully someone when they both stuck to themselves and had friends.

The most interruption her life had was when children started going missing. Both kids younger than her and in her age range. She only knew one person who went missing, but she didn’t like to think about it.

Though the children were never found, kids stopped disappearing that summer, to her relief. The only thing weird was how people stopped talking about them, but she supposed that made sense. Moving on was important, and no one wanted to make everyone sad. She did still think it was a bit odd that there wasn’t a big memorial, but maybe the families had requested it. Slowly, the missing persons’ posters disappeared, with the last one, Georgie Denbrough’s, being ripped down two weeks before the new school year started. She knew the one that was ripped well; it was on the telephone pole in front of her house. She frowned when she saw it torn in half when she was walking her dog Chrissy around the neighborhood. At least it wouldn’t make her mom sad anymore; Mom had been one of little Georgie’s teachers. Tanya didn’t know the family well, but she’d smiled sympathetically at his brother when the news first broke. She knew that wasn’t much, but it was all she could do. It would be awkward to go up and talk to someone you hardly know.

Now, it was time for school to start again. That was good; Tanya always appreciated the structure of a routine, and school certainly gave her that.

She was glad to share a class with two friends, though they surely wouldn’t be allowed to sit together. Her, Heather, and Jaime giggled a little together over Michael J. Fox before their algebra teacher came in to read out attendance and give them their seating chart. Tanya was pleasantly surprised to be seated next to Eddie Kaspbrak.

They didn’t know each other well, and she certainly wouldn’t call them friends. But she knew they wouldn’t distract each other, and that he always had an extra pen or pencil so long as you were polite about asking. Overall, being placed next to him was a teacher’s pet’s dream come true. 

The only problem came from the fact that while Eddie was on her right side, Richie Tozier was on her left.

Now, Tanya wouldn’t say she hated Richie. The only kids she hated were Bowers and his gang, and saying that she hated Richie just wouldn’t be fair to him. She was sure that he was perfectly nice. However, she knew of his reputation, and had been in his class in the fifth grade. And Tanya knew that he talked a lot; he was always causing distractions and interruptions, and he just never seemed to stop moving. She was sure that no matter who he was placed next to, he would find some way to distract them. It was a talent he possessed.

To put it simply, she had the perfect neighbor on one side, and the worst one on the other. She eyed her friends, mentally asking them to help in some way, but they were just laughing at her.

She headed over to the dreaded seat along with the two boys, trailing behind as they talked to each other about something she probably wouldn’t understand anyways, because boys talk about weird things. While a part of her was thinking about how weird it was that they were friends, what with their clashing personalities, she was mainly focused on bemoaning her tragic fate. Tanya bit her tongue, sat down, and took out her lilac pencil case and her white notebook, determined to ignore every irrelevant word coming out of a certain boy’s mouth. Just take in deep, steady breaths. Everything would be fine; she just had to spend fourth five minutes with him per day.

Surprisingly, she survived without snapping. Sure, the chatter rarely ceased, but it wasn’t directed at her, at least.

It was annoying to have Richie lean over her desk to talk to Eddie, but at least the other boy tried his best not to indulge him. She could appreciate that at the very least.

When Mrs. McGuire stopped the lesson five minutes early, Tanya let out a sigh of relief. She put away the syllabus, zipping up her stuff in her book bag before sipping at her water bottle. It was then when she noticed the lines on Eddie’s arm. Those were familiar to her; they looked like what happened when she took the cast off her arm three years ago. Had Eddie broken his arm too recently? She wouldn’t know; they didn’t live near each other at all, as far as she knew. Tanya couldn’t help herself from an urge of curiosity about what happened.

“What happened to your arm?” She asked quietly when his conversation with Richie came to a lull. “Are you okay?”

The boys blinked at her owlishly for a few moments, acting surprised she noticed. “I broke it; I fell off of my bike near the barrens.” Eddie eventually said, sounding awkward. “I’m fine, though; don’t worry about it.”

Richie nodded. “Yeah, this clumsy asshole slid off of it like it was - “ He was interrupted by Eddie hitting him, and Tanya decided that she would really rather not know what he was going to say before the interruption, thanks. Remember, deep and steady breaths.

She smiled at the boys. “Well, I’m glad you’re okay. Breaking an arm’s awful.” After she spoke, the bell rang, and by the time she got on her backpack, the two were gone. She huffed a little to herself. “You’re welcome.” Tanya said under her breath, before walking over to her friends so they could walk to their next class together and maybe talk a little more about how pretty Michael J. Fox’s eyes were and how soulful they seemed. All about that normalcy. 

During her next class, she was seated next to the new kid from last year. Turns out his name was Ben.

Tanya could already tell that physics wouldn’t be her strong suit, and it seemed like Ben agreed with her. He was writing in his notebook things that certainly didn’t look like notes about Mr. Vern’s introductory lecture. She chewed lightly on her tongue, opening up her own notebook and starting to doodle with her ballpoint pen. She started to draw a balloon, and when she was done, she began to color it in with another pen, this time a red one. The hair on the back of her neck started to rise, and she felt like she was being watched.

When she looked up, she saw Ben looking at the page she was drawing on and looking horrified. As he noticed her looking, his eyes widened before hardening. Confused, she waved with an awkward smile. He slowly relaxed, and picked up his own notebook, showing her his own page. There was a lot of writing she couldn’t decipher, but she could see a lot of repeating of words. She gave a thumbs up before looking back down at her own paper before the teacher caught her looking at his. What if Mr. Vern thought they were passing notes? Tanya had made it this far without any detentions, and she was determined to never get one.

As class ended and they headed out, she could almost swear that she heard Ben whisper ‘sorry’ in her ear.

Once again, she was seated next to a boy she vaguely knew. Stanley Uris was one of the only other Jewish kids in school, and they saw each other occasionally at temple. They nodded to each other politely before sitting down quietly to listen to their teacher’s explanation of the English syllabus. Like Eddie, Stan was also a good neighbor, and unlike in algebra, there was no distractions. Luckily, the lesson ended early again, and she was able to pack up without rushing. One of the boys who unofficially hung out with the Bowers gang approached, and Tanya bristled in preparation for what he was about to say. What would it be this time?

“What the fuck happened to your face?” The bully said, already seemingly ready to laugh about this with his friends.

Tanya hadn’t noticed anything wrong, but now that it was pointed out to her, she could see tiny scars around Stan’s temples. The other boy had opened his mouth to say something, but she cut in. “Why does it matter?” She asked before she could help herself, narrowing her eyes and balling her hands up into fists.

Both boys looked at her in surprise, but Stan bounced back quicker. “I fell face first into a porcupine; what does it look like?” He replied with a dry expression on his face. The bully apparently wasn’t used to stepping into Bowers’ shoes, and so he just muttered something about them being defensive, and that he was just asking a question. His friends were still laughing, but they walked away as the bell rang. Stan and her looked at each other for a little while. “You didn’t have to do that, you know.” He said quietly, packing up his backpack.

She shrugged. “No, but I was already riled up by thinking that he was going to say something about us being Jewish.” Tanya replied.

He nodded with a small smile. “Thanks.” Stan mumbled under his breath, before walking out of the classroom, with Tanya quickly following behind. She couldn’t be late to her next class!

Next class, history, there weren’t any assigned seats, and a new student. He introduced himself as Mike Hanlon, and said he lived on the farm near the edge of town. He used to be homeschooled, but he’d been able to transfer to public school. The only open seat was, coincidentally, right next to her. She smiled politely, a smile which he returned, and he was thankfully quiet for the rest of the class. This was good. She was pleased.

Tanya was good at history, so she was optimistic about this class. Besides, Ms. Remming’s classes were supposed to be easy. It was annoying when a teacher held your hand through the lessons, but she wasn’t about to deny herself an easy A. She remembered to smile and say thank you to the teacher as she handed out the schedule for the class; it unnerved some of her friends, how good she was at this. As the lesson came to a close and the lunch bell was about to ring, Mike moved over to her.

“What’s your name?” He asked, a friendly smile on his face.

She returned it, sticking out her hand. “Tanya Clarke. We’ll probably be working together on some projects; I haven’t had Ms. Remming before, but my friends say she groups together four people who sit near each other.” She explained, hoisting up her bookbag and putting the strap over one shoulder.

Mike nodded. “It’s good to meet you, then.” After he spoke, the lunch bell rang, and they walked to the cafeteria in pleasant silence. He veered off to go to a table, as she went to go stand in line. Surprisingly, the most liked part of Derry High were the lunches. They always had pizza and burgers available, along with a salad bar. It wasn’t the best food, but it was decent enough, and that worked well for hungry teenagers.

When she purchased her meal, she walked over to where her friends all sat, sitting down near the edge. They seemed to all be talking about a new horror movie that had came out last week. 

Tanya didn’t really like scary things, so she let her attention wander. There, behind their table, was a group of… everyone who had been sat beside her thus far. She had known that Eddie, Richie, and Stan were friends, but she hadn’t known that they also knew Ben and Mike. Along with them sat Bill Denbrough, and a girl she remembered her friends saying had daddy issues. What an odd grouping. She was pulled out of thinking about the other table when Jessie waved a hand in front of her face, bangles jingling on her arm.

Everyone laughed. “Does someone have a crush?” Jaime asked, giggling as she poked her fork in Tanya’s direction.

She could feel her face warm. “No! Ew, guys. I was just wondering why those people are sitting together.” She tilted her head in the direction of the other table. “It doesn’t seem like they’d all be hanging out, you know? Besides, it looks like most of them have been hurt recently; Eddie Kaspbrak got a broken arm last summer, Stanley Uris’ face is all messed up, and the rest of them have bruises.” Tanya shrugged as she stabbed her salad with a fork. “It just doesn’t really make sense to me.”

Heather glanced over. “It… does seem kind of weird.” She admitted quietly.

Nicole let out a snort, rolling her eyes as she sipped at her water. “They’re all weird; it makes sense that they’d stick together. You know, kids in high school and middle school form packs. They find a thing or two they have in common, then they stick together like glue. The jocks, the theatre kids, the goths… it’s like, a thing.”

Jessie grinned, eyes darting back and forth like she had a secret. “You’ll never guess what I heard about Eddie Kaspbrak and Richie Tozier!”

Jaime shoved her. “That’s been a rumor since, like, the fifth grade, Jessie.” She said with a sigh. “Besides, we’re not bitches like Greta and her friends. So don’t be a bitch!”

Tanya let her mind wander off again, not interested in the conversation. When the lunch bell rang, she headed off to chemistry. The regular teacher was out on maternity leave, so they had a sub. Once again, there was assigned seating, and once again, she was seated next to a member of the unusual group. This time, it was the girl, who it turns out to be named Beverly Marsh. They awkwardly smiled at each other before the sub began droning on about the syllabus.

She rested her chin on her palm with a sigh, leaning against her desk when something caught her eye.

Beverly was mirroring her position, apparently chewing some gum. There were bruises on her arms, faded but still present. She wasn’t facing forwards, rather reading a piece of notebook paper; Tanya recognized it as being the same handwriting as the page that Ben had shown her. She tried to subtly lean towards Beverly, feeling a surge of curiosity about what was written on the notebook page. Evidently, she wasn’t as subtle as she believed she was, seeing as Beverly looked up at her. Tanya’s face flushed, and she looked away quickly, biting her lip. She didn’t want to be seen as nosy! That was a horrible first impression.

She heard a laugh from where the other girl was sitting, and when she looked over, Beverly was crossing her eyes, sticking out her tongue at Tanya, who snorted.

The sub hit his yard stick against the board, and Tanya jumped, turning to face forward again. When the class ended, Beverly smiled at her again, but it was more genuine this time. She returned it shyly, before heading out to the last class of the day. It was an elective; art history. 

Tanya wasn’t much of an artist, but she did like doodling, so she decided to take this. There were assigned seats yet again, and this time, she was seated next to Bill, to no surprise. This whole day was a weird series of coincidences that almost made her believe that Derry was as weird as everyone said. The first thing they had to do wasn’t related to the syllabus; they had to fill out some questionnaires about their personalities. She wrote in her favorite purple pen, making sure to make the answers as accurate and precise as she could.

Next to her, Bill cleared his throat.

She looked up, confused; they were the only ones at the table, but why would he want to talk to her? They’d exchanged maybe fifteen words throughout all of their years at the same schools. “What is it, Bill?” Tanya asked; she wasn’t worried about being reprimanded for talking, as everyone else was. “Do you need anything?” No need to be rude to him, after all. He seemed nice enough.

He looked down at his paper. “I-I just wanted to say that I’m sorry. Y-you were nice to m-me with Georgie, and… and I know you were close with B-Betty. But I didn’t say a-anything.”

Tanya blinked. Had been close with Betty? Suddenly, her mind was swarmed by memories she had pushed aside, either consciously or unconsciously. Betty Ripsom had been her best friend, part of her group. Tanya and her used to hang out all the time, looking at magazines and watching movies. They’d been two peas in a pod. She remembered when she last saw Betty. “I’m scared.” The other girl had said. “I keep seeing shadows out of the corner of my eye. And I always feel like I’m being watched.” Betty had hugged her knees to her chest, resting her chin on them. Tanya had reassured her that she was just sleep deprived, that everything would be alright. The next day, Betty hadn’t come to her house like she’d promised, and the police found her bright pink bike abandoned on the side of the road. She remembered when she’d smiled at Bill, it had been weak and broken, how her mother had pulled her from school early that day.

Bill shook her arm hard. “A-are you okay?” He asked, face pale. She touched her face and realized she was crying.

She pulled away. “I’m fine.” Tanya said, pursing her lips and going back to writing. When the bell rang, she walked away quickly, intentionally avoiding Bill. She unlocked her bike without talking to any of her friends, brow furrowed, and headed off, one of the first students to leave.

As if it wasn’t her bidding, she stopped halfway to her house. Tanya had been so caught up in her thoughts that she took a moment to realize where she was. It was Neibolt street. Across from her, she could see that creepy old house. She’d never been one to believe in ghost stories, but she could understand it had a weird atmosphere. There were probably a billion squatters in the damn thing. It felt… odd.

The building felt like it was alive. She could almost imagine the door opening by itself to reveal the maze of doors and hallways that she was sure laid within. In the back of her mind, she heard whispers. ‘Are you scared of a silly house? You really are?’ She shook her head, and the whispers became more faint. She got off of her bike, parking it securely, before walking across the street. Tanya stared up at the blackened house with a glare, before she spat in the yard. She wasn’t the type of person to do this normally, so it was messy and felt gross. She wasn’t even entirely sure why she did that. Still, it made her feel better.

She returned to her bike, mounting it, before riding away. As she left and the house’s foreboding visage faded, memories of Betty Ripsom faded from her mind once more.

Tanya Clarke was happy to say that she was perfectly normal, thank you very much.

**Author's Note:**

> I play fast and loose with canon. I hope this was enjoyable; I know some people don’t like ocs. Also, I physically couldn’t help myself from having a couple of reddie hints. Might make this a series if people are interested.


End file.
